The World according to Gaz

Reminising

2012-03-15T21:28:00.004+11:00

Whenever Ruby and i are together she has a habit of choosing the moment that my guard is down (a few beers or champagne will do it) she will ask about the Gaz that was before she met me.
She is often fascinated with my love of redheads.
To me it is natural to be obsessed with something rare.
Here is a rough transcript of our discussion on Ranga's .
Ruby : So Gaz what is it about these girls that you like so much?
Gaz : That's a tough question, i think it started in High School when i took a fancy to an Italian/Scottish chick.
R: How does that work?
G: Italian dad , Scottish mother.
R: Ok so what was so good about her? Did you get to shag her? Anything?
G: No nothing , just liked her a lot but the like was shared. Well not more than a friend anyway.
R: Ok then what happened?
G: My mate , when i was 18 brought this chick to my birthday, he went home with her and from all accounts he was in or so he thought.
So they and a bunch of others went away camping and she dumped him. Told me later he was a crap kisser which is ironic because she used to kiss without using tongue.
R: WTF??? Can you kiss me again like she used to?
So we kissed and it was weird and horrible just like i remember.
G: So a little while later i get invited to a party they were having. Turns out the redhead fancied me too and she basically seduced me at her party.
R: You hussy. so what happened?
G: Basically we got busted in her bed by her mum.
Ruby is laughing now
G: It didn't last but a few years later after i had busted up with Sandie
R: She was the underage girl that died right?
G: Yes but that's another story. We did what Victorian do and went on a bustrip over the border to play the pokies. It was a fundraiser for our mates squash club.
Anyhow it was just an excuse to get up really early in the morning and drink until it finished.
I somehow ended up back at my mates place, he had a mattress on the floor, he took the bed with his girlfriend and i ended up on the floor with the redhead.
As you well know when i'm pissed 2 things happen.
I have no memory of the event and i seem to be able to fuck like a madman.
So after that i i just became obsessed.
I can tell you what the best thing was , i got a glimpse of her bush and i was hooked.
R: How did that happen? Didn't you shag her before that?
G: Like i said when i'm pissed i remember nothing but when sober i remember lots and her fiery box got my attention.
R: Is that all it takes? laughing again.
G: That did it then.

Should be more of this

2012-03-15T19:07:00.001+11:00

Her name is Kate Upton.
She gets my vote.

Away from home again

2012-03-15T19:01:00.001+11:00

That's right i am away again and as usual lonely and horny.
Sadly this time i am alone.
I have scoured a few sex sites and caught up on blog posts.
I will shower, put on something casual and wander over to the pub nearby.
The worst bit about that is i will be by myself and i hate it.
I did put a few feelers out and i am hoping to catch up with some old friends online but as i have a 7 am start tomorrow doubt i will be still awake when they are online.
Ever the optimist we will see what happens.
Sadly i think the best outcome will be a quiet tug to put me to sleep for the night

Underwire bras

2012-03-13T08:56:00.000+11:00

For some women, it's easy to find bras that fit in styles they like. But many others aren't so lucky, spending endless time and money in search of that elusive perfect style and fit.




The underwire bra is designed to provide additional lift.
Underwire can be found in many different styles of bras.
Some women swear by their underwire and others find them very uncomfortable.
One way to determine if this is a style of bra that will work for you is to give it a try©
Underwire Bra - from Paris

Underwire Bra - from New York

Underwire Bra - from London

Underwire Bra from Collingwood , Victoria , Australia ....



You can substitute Collingwood for any suburb in the world. The joke is still the same.

The end ???

2012-03-13T08:33:00.001+11:00

I found myself reminiscing over the weekend of a wonderful 24 hours i spent with Ruby.
It got me thinking how could that be ever topped?
Then i figured it could never happen again and that we should end on a high.
That once in a lifetime thing when all the worlds aligned just right.

But then i came to my senses, of course i could do that again.
Just a matter of when?
Spurs me on to next time now.

Thanks Ruby

Porn and me

2012-03-09T10:00:00.000+11:00

One of the things that Ruby and i did was sit down and watch some porn.
Nothing better than sitting back on the couch,naked, beer in one hand and my girl in a similar state next to me.
We were watching an Alex Braun parody.
Trailer is here

Anyway the opening scene was a 3some with a stewardess and the pilot and co pilot.
Much to Ruby's delight.
What we really couldn't get our heads around was all the spitting.
The chick would spit on her hand while she was wanking, the guys spat on their cocks before slipping it in. Sometimes they just spat to watch it run down her chest.
Every time they did we would look at each other and shake our heads.
Ok i get spitting on your hand to reduce friction but sometimes it's kinda nice to feel a bit rub.
We also laughed when they got to the money shot and splashed her face only to see her dribble it down her chin.
Each to there own i guess but it did nothing for us.

24 Hours with Ruby

2012-03-08T12:59:00.000+11:00

And what a wonderful way to spend it.
Holed up in her room from the early hours of yesterday morning to the early hours of this morning.
No surprises really what we got up to in that time.
To make my excuses for my absence i rang in sick.
When i was back in the office some of the sales girls inquired how i was feeling?
You really don't look that well, they said, your sort of pale looking.
I assured them i felt fine today and wasn't likely to infect anyone with my "illness"
Ruby just laughed as i told her about while she was sitting on the train heading for her 2nd part of her birthday celebrations with her husband.
Must be all the cum i drained from you yesterday or was it this mornings effort?
We just laughed some more and then she assured me she had a good wash.
Don't want to upset him was her reasoning.

That 24 hours was one that will be hard to top but as is goes with Ruby, when there is a challenge she is always willing to give it a go.
No additional people this time around except for our phone sex effort but i wouldn't rule it out as a possibility in the not too distant future.

Almost a threesome

2012-03-06T10:48:00.000+11:00

Well Ruby is back in town and never one to do things conventionally we had our first virtual threesome.
Last week Ruby had a chance to catch up with a mutual friend who we had speculated would be a perfect fit for both of ours first threesome.
From all reports conversation flowed well and there seemed to be a connection there.
Our friend i will call Whipper because he is a bit younger than both of us had emailed Ruby asking her to give him a call. He cheekily suggested she do it when i had her bent over and was taking her from behind.
No sooner had she read it she grabbed me by the cock and lead me off to the bed. Grabbing her phone on the way.
As i positioned myself behind her she dialed him number.
Hello Whipper speaking.
Hello, ...it's...Ruby...here. as she tried to speak as i worked away from behind.
Oh , ha ha ha how are you, obviously Gaz is looking after you lol.
At some stage she handed the phone to me but her whimpering and moaning got the better of me and i had to say goodbye as i would rather concentrate on the job at hand.
The only thing i thought was she needed something in her mouth at the point but Whipper was too far away to help us out.
Something to plan on for the future.
Luckily for me a project i am working on requires a bit of overnight travel so tomorrow night i will be "traveling" but in reality i will be staying the night with the lovely Ruby.
She sent a text this morning saying she was on wobbly legs after yesterday so i suggested she get some rest because that was only a start and if we will be together for the next 24 hours things can only get wobblier.

Ruby's return

2012-03-01T23:47:00.002+11:00

Not sure if i will get a chance to post this but Ruby is in town from Friday.
Sadly because of my own absence from home i won't get a chance to see her properly until Monday.
We have lots planned but again i probably will post all the details after the event.
Just have to find a way to keep TM interested but on the back burner until she is gone.
Ideas she has run the gamut of our own imaginations
3somes
spa sex
chocolate
cooking for each other

Stay tuned and she promise to bring her camera again so maybe even a new movie

Away and thoughts

2012-03-01T20:03:00.002+11:00

Well i made it back to the border and as i expected once i left nothing more was completed with my equipment.
I had a long discussion , well as long as you can with the Lady Ops manager.
I was asking her if she had ordered the parts for the additional work.
No i am waiting for an order and anyway you flying is costing us a fortune.
I bit my tongue but i really should have pointed out the cost of the flight was way cheaper than the 7 hours of my time in a car to drive there.
As usual i said nothing and hung up.
After i hung up i got to thinking, I could continue to complain and just leave or i could do something about it and take her out of the equation.
To do that i could either try and transfer job responsibilities to the interim manager or push to become a manager in my own right.
Of course that would mean major sacrifices but all the responsibility would lay with me.

It is something to consider

TMI - Sex and Romance

2012-02-28T12:55:00.002+11:00

TMI Tuesday – February 28, 2012

Sex & Romance

This week’s TMI Tuesday is about sex and romance. Who doesn’t enjoy a little romance or the art of seduction before engaging in sex? Often times the prelude is better than the actual ‘event’.
1. You are sitting alone in a restaurant because your lunch date is late. Do you:
a) Throw something and then make out with the waiter.
b) Check to make sure he or she didn’t get into an accident, then wait patiently for two hours and use the time to compose a love song or poem.
c) Send a nasty text followed up by a voice mail telling him/her that “romance is dead and so are you!”
d) Wait for 20 minutes, and then text-message a pal to join you for lunch.

I would wait everyone is entitled to be late sometimes.I have even on occasion had to cancel due to scheduling problems.

2. What’s more important, a romantic relationship or your career?

Career - it pays the bills

3. You love to role play in the bedroom, which one of these is more likely to be your kink?
a. Doctor and the naughty nurse
b. You’re the gardener, I’m the hoe
c. Persnickety principal and the wayward pupil that needs a spanking
d. Me Tarzan, you Jane
e. Scattered-brain boss and the seductive secretary

Doctor and Nurse,. I'm too boring for any of the other ones lol

4. When you want sex, who tends to make the first move?
a. Me! I like to go for what I want.
b. It varies. Sometimes my partner/significant other/date or sometimes me.
c. Oh definitely the other person. Even if I want it, I’m not about to admit such a thing.
d. I drop subtle hints hoping he/she will pick up on it.

d. Even tried begging but it doesn't help.

5. When it comes to lovemaking, select the answer that best describes you/your attitudes
a. vanilla – meets society’s middle of the road standards
b. adventurous
c. kinky
d. trisexual – I will try anything once, twice if I like it, three times to make sure. –Mae West

With the wife a. everyone else d.

6. You want to seduce that sexy someone, what is the sweet-nothing that you’ll whisper in his/her ear?

Never was much good with sweet talk, maybe how about we go to bed and see what happens next?

Bonus: What’s your idea of a romantic getaway?

Anything without the kids. Their good and all but anytime we can get away without them is always nice.

Bullshit red tape

2012-02-28T11:41:00.001+11:00

Just got this...

Hi Lady Ops Manager,

Gaz has asked me to book flights to the border on 1/3 and return on 2/3 also, another one on 13/3 and return on 14/3.

I was just told that I need to have an manager’s approval for all the travel booking.

Can you please email me the approval for his travel and accommodation for a night on both occasions?

Thanks.

Rubbish Admin girl.

The above is the step that i didn't bother with last time and now have been told that i will be disciplined about.

Such nonsense just to get a flight to actually do the work.

I did tell the Stupid Admin girl that the request came from the manager but that fell on deaf ears.

Off again and family fueds

2012-02-28T11:00:00.001+11:00

I received an email this morning informing me my attendance was required on the border again.
As per usual they wanted me Thursday and they called today (Tuesday)
I rang the lady Ops manager and explained the email i had just received and this time i let her make the decision on how i was getting there.
Well obviously you will have to fly there, i just wish they had given a bit more notice so the airfare could have been cheaper.
I told her how they also wanted me on site again mid March and finally in May so maybe they could be cheaper.
I handed over my corporate card to the admin girl and she is doing it all for me this time.
Less hassles that way apparently.

Didn't get a chance to blog about it yesterday but i wanted to talk about my family birthday dinner on Sunday.
My mother inquired via my sister if my cousin and his wife were invited the week before to my daughters birthday dinner.
She followed through and asked only to be told no they weren't.
Oh and why is that?
Because i didn't invite them obviously.
Seemed logical to me.
Anyway Mum rang and left a message on my phone telling me that as they had missed my daughters birthday that she had invited them and not to be mad about it.
I told J who was furious.
You go and ring your mother and tell her your pissed off and as it's not her party she can't just invite other people.
I duly did and then rang my cousin to explain that they weren't invited except i spoke to his wife and somehow it twisted around and i didn't do it.
J then rang them back , apologized and uninvited them.
My brother then got involved and told mum she needed to say she was sorry to J.
Which she did eventually.
Sunday night rolled around and now my other sister has the shits because she has some girly crush on my cousins wife and wanted to see them.
Mum will have gotten over the snubbing by now but my sister holds a grudge so have no expectations that her demeanor will change anytime soon.

Maybe one of these for my birthday?

2012-02-24T07:52:00.002+11:00

On this day

2012-02-22T10:00:00.000+11:00

In the headlines today:

1998	Singer Tori Amos marries sound engineer Mark Hawley.
1997	Singer-actress Jennifer Lopez marries former waiter Ojani Noa.
1987	Pop artist Andy Warhol dies in New York City at age 58.
1967	The Beatles record a trio of pianos for A Day In The Life, a song that will ultimately appear on their Sergeant Pepper album, at EMI Studios in London. (photo credit: Capitol Records)
1965	The Beatles begin filming scenes on location in the Bahamas for their second movie, Help!
1964	The Beatles leave for England, after completing their first American tour and appearance on The Ed Sullivan Show.
1965	Felix Frankfurter, US Supreme Court Justice, dies.
1934	It Happened One Night, starring Clark Gable and Claudette Colbert, premieres at Radio City Music Hall in New York City.
1924	Calvin Coolidge becomes the first US president to deliver a radio address from the White House.
1889	US president Grover Cleveland signs a bill to admit North and South Dakota, Montana and Washington state to the Union.
1879	Frank W. Woolworth opens his first store in Utica, New York.
1865	The US state of Tennessee makes slavery illegal.
1851	The Kirkwood runs aground in New Jersey, mistaking the Smith Hotel for a vessel that refused to return its signal.
1819	Spain cedes Florida to the US.
1813	Ft. Presentation, New York, is captured by the British, during the War of 1812.

Born today:1975 Drew Barrymore - actress
1971 Jose Solano - actor
1964 Gaz - author of this blog
1959 Kyle MacLachlan - actor
1950 Julius Erving II - basketball hall of famer
1949 Niki Lauda - auto racer
1945 Oliver - singer
1944 Jonathan Demme - movie director
1934 Sparky Anderson - baseball manager
1932 Edward Kennedy - Massachusetts senator, brother of John F. and Robert Kennedy
1918 Chuck Finley - former baseball team owner
1918 Don Pardo - TV announcer
1908 John Mills - actor
1907 Sheldon Leonard - actor, TV director, producer
1907 Robert Young - actor (Marcus Welby, M.D.)
1857 Robert Baden-Powell - founder, British Boy Scout Association
1819 James Russell Lowell - poet, author
1810 Frederic-Francois Chopin - composer, pianist
1778 Rembrandt Peale - portrait artist

1732 George Washington - US general, first US president
(photo credit: NARA)

credit : http://www.blamepro.com/cal/0222.htm

Flat

2012-02-21T10:17:00.001+11:00

I feel a bit flat today and i'm not 100% sure why.
I had planned on catching up with Dutch yesterday but family got in the way and it didn't happen.
Tomorrow is also my birthday. 48 - no big deal.
I think J and the kids are planning something but she likes to tease me and pretend nothing is happening.
We will see, if you have read past history you would know i am often disappointed.
Can't imagine this year being any different.

That wasn't so bad

2012-02-20T09:33:00.001+11:00

Well got through Saturday night relatively easily.
The side of the table that J chose to sit on meant i ended up having my back to TM.
I snuck a few glances her way but as the restaurant was crowded she didn't really see me until she was leaving so i let out a sneaky wink as she walked by.
Sunday was worse because we then had my daughter and now 5 of her besties over for bowling and laser tag.
Something disturbing stumbling across a group of 15 y/o girls lined up dancing to LMFAO's Sexy and i know it.
Just at the point where they shout Wiggle, wiggle wiggle yer. About 2:10 into the video if your curious.

This could get interesting

2012-02-17T16:03:00.001+11:00

I knew that there was always a risk associated with meeting someone who lived near me.
TM and I are back on civil speaking terms thankfully.
On Saturday night as is custom in my family , we are all going out together for a meal at the birthday girl's favorite place which in this case is a local Greek restaurant featured in Epicure magazine.
It just so happens that it is TM's husbands birthday on Saturday and she and her family are going to... that's right the same place on the same night.
When we were talking at the end of the day I couldn't believe it to be true.
I have promised to be on my best behavior and she promised to dress to impress and flirt the whole time.

Should be interesting.

That takes the cake

2012-02-16T15:35:00.001+11:00

I think in these economic times the company i work for has finally lost the plot.
I was told today after reconciling my expenses for the trip last week that as i didn't get "in writing" approval to travel (fly) that there could be disciplinary action taken.
I stared at the interim Ops manager.
Do you mean i should have driven 8 hours instead of flying up there because this job was regarded as extremely urgent and my attendance.
I was just astounded but will fight them for all there worth.

Not on Valentine's day

2012-02-15T14:33:00.002+11:00

Had a bit of a falling out with TM the other day.
Stems from her noticing that i had rejoined the dating site that we met on.
You see other than the phone it is the only other way i can reach Dutch.
I know it's a feeble excuse but one i am sticking too.
Anyway she cracked it and cut me off completely.
I explained to Dutch what was going on and she came up with a viable alternative.
I closed my account and opened another under a different name.
Problem solved.
TM is happy because as far as she knows i'm off the site.
Dutch is happy because she can still contact me and leave dirty messages safe in the knowledge that no one else will see them.
TM's reasoning was if i was on the site,
I might get a flirt message from someone and I might flirt back.
I might get a chat request. I might accept.
In her mind one thing leads to another and then she is out in the cold.
A little more demanding than a casual thing that I thought we had going but if it makes her happy, I will play the game.
We will see what happens next.

My little angel turned 15 today

2012-02-15T08:35:00.001+11:00

Yes that's right it's my daughter's birthday today.
She isn't such a bad kid and i hope she has a great day.
On the weekend we are going to a local Greek restaurant on Saturday night which is starting to freak my family out and then Sunday she and 10 of her besties are going to Laser Tag and Bowling.
Followed by a BBQ dinner at home.

Should be an interesting weekend.

Tit for Tat

2012-02-14T11:51:00.001+11:00

Food for thought

Good and bad

2012-02-14T08:37:00.003+11:00

Back into the swing of work again and kicked off the week with a performance review.
Seems i'm no good at making sensible decisions but on the plus side if someone needs a hand i'm always available.
On the magic 9 point scale i sit on a 5

Why do women who have anal sex get more orgasms?

2012-02-10T20:40:00.000+11:00

....... I tried to figure out why more women are having anal sex and why it correlates so highly with orgasms. Since 1992, the percentage of women aged 20-24 who say they’ve tried anal sex has doubled to 40 percent. The percentage of women aged 20-39 who say they’ve done it in the past year has doubled to more than 20 percent. And 94 percent of women who received anal sex in their last encounter said they reached orgasm—a higher rate of orgasm than was reported by women who had vaginal intercourse or received oral sex.

Why? For obvious reasons—anatomical, evolutionary, and aesthetic—anal sex should, on average, be less attractive and satisfying than vaginal or oral sex. In last week’s column, based on new survey data, I inferred that female orgasms caused anal sex rather than the other way around. The other acts reported by women who engaged in anal sex—vaginal intercourse, cunnilingus, partnered masturbation—delivered the orgasms. In turn, these women indulged their male partners’ requests for anal sex.

Well, shame on me. Not for talking about sodomy—that taboo seems to be fading fast—but for doubting that women love it. These women are now coming forward to affirm that they’re into it for their own pleasure, thank you very much. And they aren’t alone. Bloggers, blog readers, and Slate commenters are offering lots of other theories to explain the orgasm data.

I should start with a confession: I understated the mainstreaming of anal sex. I relied on data tables that reported how many women had done it at least once (around 40 percent), in the last year (around 20 percent), or in the last month (around 7 percent). I missed a different table (Table 4, page 284) that isolated women who were “partnered” and asked about their activities over a 90-day period. Among partnered women aged 18-24, 20 percent said they’d had anal sex in the preceding three months. Among those aged 30-39, 16 percent had done it. Among women aged 30-39 who were cohabiting but unmarried, 30 percent had done it. So we’re talking about something that a significant minority of partnered women does at least several times a year.

Why do they do it? And why do those who do it most often (women who reported anal intercourse in their last encounter) get the most orgasms? Here are some theories proposed by readers and bloggers.

1. Anal sex causes orgasms. At least 10 women have posted comments in Slate to say that they like anal sex. Five of them say they get orgasms from it. These women aren’t porn artifacts, nor are they trolling for sex. Many are explicitly partnered; most are using full names. Others who enjoy sodomy are raising their hands here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, and here, with additional secondhand reports here and here. (All of these posts are from women; I’m setting aside the 20 or 30 secondhand reports I’ve seen from men.) I won’t try to convey their enthusiasm—you can read the testimonials yourself. Let’s just say that Tristan Taormino and Toni Bentley aren’t alone. And if you think is just male-imposed false consciousness, try reading a few lesbians on this subject.

Lots of women don’t like, want, or do anal sex (examples here, here, here, and here), and the data still suggest these women are the majority. But when I said female orgasms were causing anal sex, I shouldn’t have implied that the reverse wasn’t true. Sex is complicated. People vary. No single theory will explain the whole correlation.

2. Orgasms increase women’s willingness to try anal sex. Originally, I speculated that this effect was reciprocal: Women who got what they wanted were more likely to indulge their partners’ wishes. Some readers think my analysis was too transactional—women aren’t doing it just to please men—but they agree that the orgasm precedes the act. “I’ve had anal sex with multiple girlfriends but I don’t think it’s ever happened before she has orgasmed first,” says one man. “When we’ve been having a marathon session with serious orgasms, that’s when my wife is interested in exploring her adventurous side,” says another. These are just anecdotes, but the survey data back them up: Nearly all women who reported anal intercourse in their last encounter said they engaged in other sex acts, too.

3. Orgasms increase women’s willingness to try anal sex, which in turn causes orgasms. Theories 1 and 2 aren’t mutually exclusive. Some women cite both factors. Example:

Yup, once my boyfriend started going down on me 3+x/wk among other things, I was like, well… anal’s probably not that bad. I was more afraid of it because of scary porn. I’ve come to enjoy anal, perhaps even … prefer it? Makes my orgasm explosive. Course I want more.

4. Orgasms cause relaxation, which facilitates anal sex. “Anal sex with a woman does seem, um … easier following her orgasm … or any other kind of deep relaxation, like a massage or hot bath or bourbon,” one man reports. (See this lesbian testimonial on the same theme.) This theory is psychological but also physical: If you haven’t had an orgasm, you’re less likely to be relaxed, so you can’t do anal sex. So when women are surveyed about their last sexual experience, the only women who say they had anal sex are the ones who had orgasms.

5. Adventurousness causes orgasms and anal sex. A male commenter puts it this way:

Couples who have consensual, playful and open-minded sex lives tend to do things that result in the women in these relationships having orgasms AND to experiment with (and possibly find they enjoy) anal sex. It’s not one causing the other, but a common cause that results in the two being correlated.

That’s an intuitively appealing theory. It fits the survey findings (“greater behavior diversity is related to ease of orgasm”) and the specific data on anal sex. While nearly all women who had anal intercourse in their last encounter reported other sex acts as well, nearly half the women who had vaginal intercourse reported no other sex acts.

But is this really a matter of adventurousness? Maybe vaginal sex is simply more satisfying, so women are less likely to need an additional act. A female Slate commenter proposes a way to test the hypothesis: “My guess would be that female orgasms are also highly correlated with bondage, role play, more varied sexual positions overall, and whatever other ‘kinks’ you can think of.” Perhaps the next survey will sort this out.

6. Women who orgasm easily are more likely to try anal sex. This turns the adventurousness theory upside down. The idea here is that a woman’s relative ease of orgasm (which could be largely anatomical) is a cause, not an effect, of trying new kinks. Orgasmic women are more willing to dabble in unconventional things, including anal sex, because compared with other women, sex is more fun for them, or orgasmic payoff is more likely.

7. Self-assurance causes orgasms and anal sex. Short version: “Women comfortable enough to enjoy anal sex are pretty much relaxed enough to orgasm. They’re women who get what they want.” Longer version:

Women who offer anal sex are typically those most comfortable with themselves, their bodies or with asking for what they want from their partner, and when a woman is comfortable with those things she’s more likely to reach orgasm. … a guy’s not getting back there unless the woman is very comfortable with you being there …

Another good hypothesis. The paradox to be explained is why an act widely considered icky or deviant correlates with orgasms. The self-assurance theory uses the ick factor to explain this. To overcome the ick and deviance, you have to be the kind of woman who’s good at getting satisfaction. To that extent, anal sex doesn’t create orgasmic women. It selects them.

8. Anal sex requires affirmative interest. This is a more direct version of the self-assurance theory. A commenter explains:

Women who go for anal sex are into having anal sex. It turns them on. More likely to have an orgasm. Vaginal sex is what every women does, even those who…. aren’t interested really, so the numbers are going to be lower.

(Continued from page 1)

Again, anal sets a higher bar. Women who don’t much feel like having vaginal sex often do it anyway. Women who don’t much feel like having anal sex don’t do it. So disinterested women dilute the orgasm rate for vaginal but not anal sex. The same could be said of orgasms: Women who don’t get orgasms from vaginal sex keep doing it, but women who don’t get orgasms from anal sex stop, thereby reducing the anal-sex population to women who really get off on it.

9. Love and trust cause orgasms and anal sex. One woman writes:

The more I love and trust someone, the more likely I am to have an orgasm while with him—and the more likely I am to be okay with pushing society’s “norms” with him. Similarly, the more he proves that he knows what he’s doing, the more likely I am to let him do something that could potentially really, really hurt me.

This is the most uplifting theory. It implies that the sample of women who report regular anal sex is heavily biased toward intimate relationships. The data (Table 4, page 284) strongly support this. Compared with women who are single and dating, women in a relationship are only about 50 percent more likely, at best, to report vaginal sex in the last 90 days. But they’re two to three times more likely to report anal sex. And women who live with their boyfriends are more likely to report anal sex—but not more likely to report vaginal sex—than women who don’t. Anal sex, more so than vaginal sex, seems to correlate with intimacy and commitment. (Did I mention you should use a condom especially if you don’t know your partner well? Use a condom.)

10. Male assertiveness causes orgasms and anal sex. This is a macho inversion of the love theory. A commenter at a misogynous Web site puts it this way:

Also, women are more likely to acquiesce to buttsex demands from the highest-quality men. Anal sex is associated with orgasms, but mostly because both anal sex and orgasms occur more frequently with alphas.

Flame away, ladies.

11. Anal includes manual. Several commenters at Slate and other venues report that in their experience, women got orgasms only with a bit of simultaneous Christine O’Donnell. One man writes:

My experience with women I asked and were willing to try is that 5 women loved it, 1 was accepting but it didn’t do anything for her, 3 disliked it. All of the ones that liked it had fairly intense orgasms (no surprise there) but only if their clitoris was stimulated at the same time. It could be that the pleasurable attraction for the women is due to it being a position that allows easy access for addition stimulation.

The survey backs this up: Of women who had anal sex in their last encounter, 31 percent said they also had “partnered masturbation” (Table 4, pages 355-6). To the extent that this factor explains the happy endings, the anal orgasm data are inflated.

12. Anal sex requires more foreplay and patience, which increases the odds of orgasm. One commenter observes that anal sex is “a more drawn out experience, what with prep work.” This is more complex than the manual-stimulation theory. The best way to understand it is to look at the data in negative terms: While only 6.5 percent of women who had anal sex in their last encounter didn’t report an orgasm, 30 percent of women who had vaginal sex didn’t report an orgasm. Maybe that’s because nature makes it easier to have vaginal sex even when the man is hasty and self-absorbed. Anal sex requires more attention to the woman’s mind and body.

13. Internet porn is spreading the idea. According to a male commenter,

the most recent increase in the prevalence of anal sex is mostly due to the near simultaneous rise in access to high-speed Internet … [When people] see these fetishes carried out frequently in pornography they may slowly begin to feel more comfortable about their suppressed fetishes and even muster up the courage to find someone who shares the same fetishes.

On its face, this theory would explain only the prevalence, not the orgasms. But prevalence could increase the rate of reported orgasms by boosting the number of couples who discover they like anal sex, thereby increasing the odds that a woman who had anal sex in her last encounter (i.e., the sample of women who provided the orgasm data) did so because she likes it, not just because her partner asked.

These are just a few of the answers people have come up with. I’m excluding the vicarious pleasure theory (which doesn’t explain why anal sex outscores vaginal sex and fellatio at delivering female orgasms) and the virginity preservation theory (which, given the ulterior motive, would predict a lower, not higher, orgasm rate). I also found a few amusing disputes between women and gay men over how to do anal sex and whether women can directly get orgasms from it. And I took some criticism from the pegging community for ignoring straight men who like to be penetrated. Sorry, gents. Some other time.

The most interesting thing I learned from reading dozens of testimonials is that many sodomy enthusiasts have a slight anal superiority complex. They don’t mean to boast. It’s just that they’re more adventurous, enlightened, and fulfilled than other folks are. They’re less uptight and more comfortable with themselves. They’re better lovers, or their lovers are better. And this attitude is starting to irk some anal virgins. “There are plenty of women who are in tune with their bodies and not sexually repressed and still don’t like anal sex,” protests one woman. She notes that in her Reddit community,

[P]eople who do not enjoy certain acts are really frowned upon, and it’s bugging me. If you’re not causing anyone harm, and you and your partner are happy and satisfied, then all should be well. … when one partner is not satisfied it’s a whole different story, but it still wouldn’t be up to us to judge the more vanilla partner.

So if anal sex goes mainstream, be nice to the vanilla holdouts. And don’t be surprised if the revolution is short-lived. As women embrace sodomy, it may lose its taboo appeal for men. Lots of men are coming forward to say they don’t like it (examples here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, and here), and some seem to have been turned off to it by women who wanted it. With buggery on the daily menu, men might start begging for vaginal sex, or even kissing. Won’t that be something.

http://www.slate.com/id/2270622/

A sex ed exam for adults

2012-02-10T00:31:00.000+11:00

Last year, news broke that Washington, D.C., will require kids in public schools to complete a standardized sex ed test — the first of its kind in the nation. The announcement sparked controversy, per the usual, as well as bad jokes about “extra credit requirements.” Meanwhile, I was left wondering in all seriousness how many adults could actually pass just such an exam.

So, I decided to call upon some experts in the fields of sex research and education to help devise a multiple-choice exam for grown-ups, one that incorporates the key knowledge they find most lacking in the real world — but without being a total snooze. After all, you’re busy adults, and some of you no doubt find it difficult enough to make time for actual sex. I hope this will be less a realization of your lingering college exam nightmares than a fun challenge and, by gosh, a learning experience.

Before we begin, allow me to introduce you to my co-quizmistress, Debby Herbenick. She’s a sex educator at the Kinsey Institute and associate director of the Center for Sexual Health Promotion, and she was generous enough to let me pilfer questions from her books “Because It Feels Good” and the upcoming “Read My Lips: A Complete Guide to the Vagina and Vulva.” Carol Queen, Good Vibrations’ staff sexologist, and Heather Corinna, creator of the teen sex advice website Scarleteen, also offered some input from the sex-ed trenches. Thank you’s all around.

Now, (stylus) pencils out!

1) A paraphilia is:

a. A fetish for parachuting
b. An incurable sexually transmitted infection
c. A clinical category of sexual disorders
d. A word I just made up to sound smart

2) Abstinence-only education:

a. Delays first intercourse
b. Reduces rates of teen pregnancy
c. Reduces rates of STIs
d. All of the above
e. None of the above — and yet Congress has spent over $1.5 billion on it

3) What is the average duration of heterosexual intercourse?

a. Less than a minute
b. 13 minutes
c. 8 minutes
d. 25 minutes

4) Roughly how many women can orgasm from vaginal penetration alone?

a. 10 percent
b. 20 percent
c. 60 percent
d. All of them, they just haven’t met Mr. Right

5) Non-human animals have been observed doing all of the following EXCEPT:

a. Group sex
b. Same-sex sexual behavior
c. Making dildo-like objects
d. Oral sex
e. “Except” nothing — they’ve done all of the above and then some. Uncivilized animals.

6) What infection is NOT included in most STI screenings?

a. Chlamydia
b. Gonorrhea
c. Herpes
d. HIV

7) How many men have faked orgasm?

a. 10 percent
b. 25 percent
c. 40 percent
d. None — dudes can’t fake it and don’t have to

A woman may experience orgasm as a result of sensory information from which of the following nerves:

a. Pudendal nerve
b. Pelvic nerve
c. Hypogastric nerve
d. Vagus nerve
e. All of the above

9) Which is generally the most pleasure-prone part of a man’s penis?

a. The underside of the glans
b. The top side of the penile shaft
c. The head
d. It’s all the same

10) Which of the following is true about marital satisfaction?

a. It generally decreases after you have a baby together
b. It all goes to hell after the baby’s born
c. It is usually not affected after a couple has a baby together

11) What percent of married adults are largely satisfied with their sexual partner?

a. 54 percent
b. 64 percent
c. 94 percent
d. 0 percent. Married couples don’t have sex

12) Which of the following can reduce the effectiveness of oral contraceptives?

a. Female orgasms
b. Antibiotics
c. Antidepressants
d. All of the above

13) Stop reading, Mom. Approximately what percent of heterosexual women and men in the U.S. have had anal sex?

a. 10 percent
b. 15 percent
c. Trick question! Only gay men have anal sex
d. 25 percent

14) How long does it usually take for symptoms of HIV to appear?

a. Two weeks
b. Six months
c. Two years
d. Over a decade

15) How many women and men feel preoccupied with their sexual performance?

a. 5 percent of women, 10 percent of men
b. 15 percent of women, 15 percent of men
c. 30 percent of women, 50 percent of men
d. 0 percent of women (all they have to do is lie there), 0 percent of men (what’s there to worry about?)

16) A person who has oral herpes (cold sores) can pass the herpes virus to a partner while performing oral sex on them.

a. True
b. False

17) Among young, healthy men who have difficulties getting or keeping an erection, the cause is most often related to:

a. Erectile dysfunction
b. Performance anxiety
c. Peyronie’s disease
d. Phimosis

18) Approximately what percent of couples have experienced sexual problems?

a. 10 to 20 percent
b. 32 to 40 percent
c. 57 to 70 percent
d. 78 to 95 percent

19) Which of the following lubricants can be used safely with latex condoms:

a. Silicone-based lubricants
b. Water-based lubricants
c. Oil-based lubricants
d. All of the above
e. A and B only

20) How many U.S. states grant same-sex marriage licenses?

a. 6
b. 4
c. 10
d. None

21) What is a “gender identity”?

a. It dictates whom a person is sexually attracted to
b. It is a person’s inner sense of maleness and/or femaleness
c. It is your biological sex
d. All of the above

22) Roughly how many men and women have never masturbated?

a. 2 percent of men and 25 percent of women
b. 10 percent of men and 20 percent of women
c. 1 percent of men and 15 percent of women
d. 5 percent of men and 11 percent of women

23) Which is the fastest-growing group of people with HIV in the U.S.?

a. Homosexuals
b. Men who have sex with men
c. African-American women
d. Gay Caucasian men

24) What is the most-visited porn site on the Internet?

a. LiveJasmin.com
b. YouPorn.com
c. XTube.com
d. Spankwire.com

25) Which acts as an abortifacient?

a. Plan B
b. RU-486
c. IUDs
d. All of the above

26) The HPV vaccine can reduce the risk of:

a. Genital warts
b. Cervical cancer
c. Anal cancer
d. All of the above

27) A woman’s virginity can be proven by:

a. An intact hymen
b. Bleeding during first intercourse
c. Both A and B
d. Nothing — it can’t be proven with physical evidence

Pencils down! Now, for the answer key: Scroll down -

1) c; 2) e; 3) c; 4) b; 5) e; 6) c; 7) b; e; 9) a; 10) a; 11) c; 12) b; 13) a; 14) d; 15) c; 16) a; 17) b; 18) d; 19) e; 20) a; 21) b; 22) d; 23) c; 24) a; 25) b; 26) d; 27) d

If you scored between:

18 and 27, you go to the head of the class. Email me and I just might send you a Certificate of Sexual Proficiency.

8 and 17, you’re probably Canadian.

One and seven, you likely landed on this page by Googling “free porn” — sorry to disappoint. (See: The answers to Question 24 above.)

Zero, your name has to be Ohashii.

http://www.salon.com/2011/09/28/sex_ed_9/singleton/

Is there anything sadder?

2012-02-09T20:32:00.001+11:00

I'm sitting alone in a motel room with a six pack of beers?

I'm watching CSI

Any takers?

That wasn't so bad

2012-02-09T18:01:00.001+11:00

After a sleepless night and an early start i landed at the town on the border to sort out the problems that had been shelved during my absence.
For the first time ever, i found myself daydreaming about the plane crashing and ;how all these worries would go with the crash.
To my surprise after completing the mandatory site induction i found that the sub contractors had reread their own documentation only to realise that yes they did need to pull a finger out and run our wires as they had promised earlier.
I don't know if it was their error or if the Lady Ops manager had, as she has a habit of doing, dropped the ball and just forgotten about this job and it's completion date.
I spent the rest of the day helping where i could.
If i had know how little had been completed i seriously doubt i would have made the trip up here.
As the tickets had been purchased in advance i am obligated to spend the night , return to site in the morning and then fly home later that day.
The other shitty thing is it will probably be my birthday when they request my return for testing.

Tomorrow the fun begins

2012-02-08T14:46:00.001+11:00

Tomorrow morning i am flying to a job on the border.
Fingers crossed it will go well because i have arranged to spend the night there and the return flight isn't until 5pm.
I say fingers crossed because i called the contractors i am meeting up there to see how things were going.
Oh he said , your expecting us to mount your equipment?
Well yes i was, that was what was agreed i thought since you didn't want to pay for our own subbie to do the work.
We will see when you get here i guess.
Sound be an interesting day but not in a good way.
On a side note when i told Ruby i was going her only question was...
Have you lined anything up?
To be honest i have traveled a few times with work and the only time i have "something" arranged it's been with Ruby. Either she was meeting me at my hotel or as it was last time, me meeting her at hers.
I did dip my toe in the water and placed an online ad but won't be holding my breath that anything will come of it.

Fwd: Men Who Lack Supervision

2012-02-07T15:35:00.001+11:00

naturally u are toooooo sensible for any of this stuff lol

Only constant supervision can prevent these things from happening!

Do what...?

2012-02-07T12:46:00.001+11:00

So I am back at work 3 hours when the Lady Team Leader calls.
She was one of the annoyances yesterday and i did stupidly call her back.
I was returning from a job that she felt was the most important thing to be done as the customer had been at her for someone to attend for weeks.
I now need you to arrange flights and accommodation, that job on the border that we were talking about before you left has to be finished next week.
I think the parts you need are sitting in the store, better get those shipped there too.
And where are you? I enquired.
I'm at a conference in Queensland , wont be back until next week so you better sort it out.
Fan bloody tastic.
My wife has been shitty with me since we got back from holidays , i think mainly because i was still on leave while she was back at work but now i will be pissing off for a couple of days.
I haven't spoken to my interim Team Leader about this because he wants me to organise another job and leave behind the work for the other Team Leader.
As they are both together at this conference i think it's time she explained what she has asked me to do.
Let her take the barrage of abuse instead of me.

Back to the real stuff

2012-02-06T13:27:00.000+11:00

Today is sort of the official end of my holiday break.
I say sort of because it is actually a RDO.
Even though it hasn't stopped people i work with ringing or texting asking me to be in two places at once tomorrow.
I did what i felt i should and ignored them for as long as possible and then chose the order i would call back to show them how inconvenient they were to me by calling.
Seems there has been quite a bit of work just piling up waiting on my return.
Problem is i really don't care.
Maybe i will get inspired tomorrow but i seriously doubt it.

Well Hello there.

2012-02-03T11:40:00.002+11:00

Well, I'm back and the holiday was wonderful.
Don't think i will bore everyone with details except that to visit the Northern regions of Vietnam, January wasn't what you would call warm. As you would expect though HCMC was hot.
We saw lots and spent money like good tourists.

So what has everyone else been up to?
I managed a few looks at some of my favorite blogs and was pleased to see everyone was getting on with their lives.
You may not believe me but i missed you all.
Something about the connection to fellow bloggers i did miss hence my occasional visits and comments.

As well as other bloggers i missed Ruby and TM.
Thankfully email meant when i could i was able to send a message even a quick one just to say Hi.

I will try and blog more this year but there are a few challenges coming up at work and when i logged in this morning after 5 weeks away there seems to be plenty of work lined up for me. Yippee i think.

Anyway looks like it will be an interesting weekend and i will think of something witty to write about on Monday. My last official day on holidays.

PS. If anyone wants tips about Vietnam, maybe your thinking of heading over there just let me know and i can share some of my experiences.

Cheers

I'm baaaccckkk

2012-01-31T10:37:00.001+11:00

Yep i made it back, won't bore you with detals but it is nice to be home.
Can't write alot at the moment as too many eyes around but when the kids are back at school i will write more.

Merry Xmas

2011-12-25T07:57:00.000+11:00

Merry Christmas everyone

How Do You Rate in Bed? Take this Quick Quiz

2011-12-22T19:21:00.002+11:00

I saw this on http://ronald10021.blogspot.com/2011/12/how-do-you-rate-in-bed-take-this-quick.html and thought it might be fun to try.

Start at 50 and add or subtract points as stated for each statement that applies to you:

Add 10 if you are a virgin

Subtract 5 if You have had sex before. 45

Subtract 5 more if you have had sex with more then 5 people 40

Add 5 If you have never had oral sex. -

Subtract 5 if you have had or performed oral sex. 35

Subtract 2 if you have had sex in a public place. 33

Subtract 3 if you have done 69. 30

Add 5 If you have never had an orgasm.

Subtract 2 if you have masturbated. 28

Subtract 3 if you have fingered/ given a hand job to someone else. 25

Add 5 if You have never seen someone of the opposite sex naked.

Add 3 if you haven't been kissed in the past month. [At least not romantic or passionately.]

Add 2 if you have never masturbated.

Add 5 if you have never seen or watched porn.

Subtract 5 if you have made your own porn. 20

Subtract 3 if you have participated in anal sex. 17

Subtract 2 if you have used lube during sex. 15

Add 5 If you cant remember your last perverted thought.

Subtract 5 if you have used sex toys. 10

Subtract 3 if you have had a perverted thought in the past hour. 7

Subtract 2 if you have kissed someone of the same sex

_________________________________________________________________________________

Above75 means you kinda suck in bed

Above 50 means you are not so good in bed..and not so fun

Below 50 means you are fun in bed

Below 25 means you are damn great in bed!

I scored as you can see a 7.

Proof positive on on the way to Hell

Bloody boring

2011-12-22T13:18:00.002+11:00

This is the first year that i don't have a place to hide out. By that i mean a customer's building that i am supposed to be arranging to make sure things run smoothly while i am away.
This time i am stuck in the office and its so bloody boring.
No Christmas parties to attend, no one to laugh and joke with.
I freaked the Admin girl out because we were both walking the same way to get something for lunch.
She had left just before me and kept looking over her shoulder like i was stalking her.
I wasn't of course because, well i just wouldn't go there.
Tomorrow being the day before Xmas eve i will just finish at 12. Turn off the phone and let the holidays begin.

This time next week

2011-12-21T11:34:00.002+11:00

My family and i will be wandering the streets of Hanoi.
Taking in the sights and smells of this city.
Honestly i started counting down the days at the end of November but it is really obvious to me now that it is all going to happen.
Might have to get my act into gear and actually organize what i'm going to pack.

In case i don't get to say it properly, I hope everyone has a wonderful Xmas, however you celebrate it and that 2012 is a bigger and better year with love and joy for all.

I won't be posting or replying to anything while away and so you won't see me back until February.

PC Christmas Greeting

2011-12-20T18:15:00.000+11:00

I wanted to send some sort of holiday greeting to my clients and colleagues, but it is difficult in today's world to know exactly what to say without offending someone. So I met with my lawyer last night, and on advice I wish to say the following:

Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral celebration of the summer solstice holiday practiced with the most enjoyable traditions of religious persuasion or secular practices of your choice with respect for the religious / secular persuasions and / or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.

I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2012, but not without due respect for the calendar of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make our country great (not to imply that Australia is necessarily greater than any other country) and without regard to the race, creed, colour, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishes.

By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms:

This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for her / him or others and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. The wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.

Best Regards (without prejudice)

Name withheld (Privacy Act)

FIVE SEXUAL TECHNIQUES TO DRIVE HER WILD

2011-12-18T11:35:00.000+11:00

FIVE SEXUAL TECHNIQUES TO DRIVE HER WILD

#1: WET HANDS
Yep, it is the wet hands technique. Certainly one of the most popular among most women polled for this article. So simple. So exciting. You will leave her breathless.

-Fill the kitchen sink up with hot water and add a few drops of a scented dish liquid. Not too many, you don't want it to be harsh. There are many very nice scents out now, from vanilla and lavender to grapefruit. It is completely up to you.
-With a soft cloth in your hands plunge your hands into the water and get the cloth very wet.
-Now, moving slowly and gently place a dish in the water and rub the cloth across the surface of it... over and over again.
-Place the dish in clean rinse water and repeat until she is moaning with pleasure.

#2: VIBRATE ME BABY
This technique utilises what many women think of as toys… it is a little more difficult and takes a little more muscle. Extra credit on this one if you wear a black 'wife beater' shirt at the same time. Are you man enough?

- Carefully pull the vacuum out of where it has been stored. You know you want to.
-Plug it in and push all the right buttons.
- Slowly move back and forth and back and forth across the carpet, you will know when to move to a new spot.
-Move to the next spot and repeat as long as it takes to get results.

#3: THE WET T SHIRT GAME
This game is pretty easy, although you will have to think quickly while in the midst of gettin' your game on. If you can handle the amount of agitation and vibration in the first few minutes you will be okay until the end.

- You will need two piles... no I did not say poles, I said piles.
-Put everything white and light coloured in one and everything dark coloured in the other.
-Fill the washing machine with warm water and laundry soap (this is imperative... use the amount suggested by the manufacturer).
-Add the light pile. Close the lid.
-Write her a love letter about how great her eyes are while you are waiting for it to finish.
-Repeat with the dark colours except use cold water.
-Quick note: If your wife is screaming "Yes! Yes! Yes!" Don't stop what you are doing... that is called domesticus interruptus and it really is frustrating for women.

#4: WHAT GOES UP MUST COME DOWN
This is best used as a quickie, whether in the middle of the night or during a chaotic afternoon. She can't say no to this.

-When you put the toilet seat up, put it back down.
-Every time.

#5: TONIGHT IT'S ORAL GRATIFICATION
I know... I know... you almost can't take any more verbal titillation. Good thing this is a short list. This last one is amazing. It is incredible... it definitely saves the best for last. This one will take some time to master. Work on it while using other techniques several times a week and then just expose your big secret to her when she least expects it. If you already know this technique you should be using it to its full potential by adding to your repertoire of tricks.

-Learn to cook a whole meal.
-When she has had a particularly rough day run her a bath, preferably aromatic with LUSH bath stuff.
-While she is bathing fix your incredible dinner (hot dogs and popcorn does not count)
-While she is still relaxed from the bath and satiated with dinner proceed to technique #1.

Trip to Italy

2011-12-17T08:51:00.000+11:00

A young woman from Sydney, Australia, was so depressed that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean.
But just before she could throw herself from the rocks, a handsome young man stopped her.

"You have so much to live for," said the man. "I'm a sailor, and we are off to Italy tomorrow. I can stow you away on my ship. I'll take care of you, bring you food every day, and keep you happy."

With nothing to lose, combined with the fact that she had always wanted to go to Italy, the woman accepted. That night the sailor brought her aboard and hid her in a small but comfortable compartment in the hold.

From then on, every night he would bring her three sandwiches, a bottle of red wine, and make love to her until dawn. Three weeks later she was discovered by the captain during a routine inspection.

"What are you doing here?" asked the captain.

"I have an arrangement with one of the sailors," she replied. "He brings me food and I get a free trip to Italy ."

"I see," the captain says.

Her conscience got the best of her and she added, "Plus, he's screwing me."

"He certainly is," replied the Captain. "This is the Manly Ferry"

The thing I am not

2011-12-16T12:30:00.001+11:00

I am a lot of things to a lot of people.
To other people i am a son, a brother, a husband, a father, a lover, a friend and a confidant.
Sometimes even a mixture.
What i don't do very well is IT.
I hate computers with a passion that is usually reserved for a mortal enemy.

For some reason the interim Ops manager has decided that i haven't suffered enough and asked me to take on a project that had been sitting around for about 5 months.
When i first started the job had plenty of money on it and bucket loads of time.
Now not so and i still haven't even got past the second step of the 20 step process to complete the job.
In spite of the fact that i told him at the beginning this isn't what i do and i really have little or no interest in the outcome he was insistent that it was a task that i should complete.
He also gave me some shit about growth but by that stage i had figured out this was something i was bound to fail.
The so called technical expert refused to help on the grounds i hadn't read the instruction sheet.
My complaint about that was it was 500 pages long, buried under a pile of information that wasn't relevant and to top it off he was pissed with the company and was about to quit.

Now the task has been reassigned, where i think it should have been assigned originally and i am "supposed" to be learning from the new guy.
Going to be interesting because he tends to be a loner and refuses to help with even the simplest of requests.

What do i care anyway, i finish work on Friday and won't be back until February.

I reckon the job will still be there when i get back and the customer, he is a another story.

An affair with an older woman...

2011-12-16T07:28:00.000+11:00

Toy review finally

2011-12-15T12:00:00.001+11:00

Got a chance to meet with TM after what had seemed to be forever.
Not sure what the old ladies from the Croquet Club thought when the two of us slipped into the clubhouse but at the time i really didn't give it a second thought.
As soon as i stepped through the door TM was all over me , smothering me in welcoming kisses before undoing my trousers and welcoming other parts of my body.
We quickly dispensed with our clothes and found somewhere more comfortable than the door to play.

I cheekily produced the latest sextoy sent from EdenFantasys and said , "Here's an early Xmas present for you"
It was a 10 speed vibrating egg
We opened the package and inserted the batteries that came with it.
I like the color and the feel, were the first things TM said.
Pushing the button on the bottom produced a mild vibration catching her by surprise.
Moving through the modes some seemed to appeal and other just made her turn her nose up.
Carefully it was inserted and again we made our way through the various settings.
Sadly TM isn't a toy kind of girl and nothing seemed to tick her boxes.
Even when i added a bit of attention to her clit and sucked madly on her nipples she felt the egg inside was too distracting and really not her idea of fun.
Overall the effect wasn't what she wanted and we resorted to the more traditional methods of getting each other off.

This is what awaits me this afternoon

2011-12-14T12:27:00.000+11:00

Damn fine for 53 I think.

Women over 50 !

2011-12-13T11:05:00.000+11:00

Women over 50!

In case you missed it on 60 Minutes, this is what Andy Rooney thinks about women over 50.
60 Minutes Correspondent Andy Rooney (CBS)

“As I grow in age, I value women over 50 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why:

A woman over 50 will never wake you in the middle of the night & ask, 'What are you thinking?' She doesn't care what you think.

If a woman over 50 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She goes and does something, she wants to do, & it's usually more interesting.

Women over 50 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you, if they think they can get away with it.

Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated.

Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 50.

Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 50 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.

Older women are forthright and honest.. They'll tell you right off if you are a jerk or if you are acting like one. You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.

Yes, we praise women over 50 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 50, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year old waitress. Ladies, I apologize.

For all those men who say, 'Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?’ Here's an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage. Why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!”

Andy Rooney is a really smart guy!

7 reasons not to mess with children

2011-12-12T14:10:00.001+11:00

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human. It was physically impossible. The little girl said "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah". The teacher asked "What if Jonah went to hell?" The little girl replied "Then you ask him".

A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was. The girl replied, "I'm drawing God". The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like". Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a minute".

A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to "honour" thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?" Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill".

One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head. She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mum?" Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white". The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, "Mummy, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"

The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. "Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, "There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer," or "That's Michael, he's a doctor". A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, she's dead".

A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face". "Yes," the class said. "Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?" A little fellow shouted, "Cause your feet ain't empty"

The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE. God is watching". Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note "Take all you want. God is watching the apples".

First's

2011-12-12T13:44:00.001+11:00

Ruby is always asking "Was that the first time you ever did ... ?"
She likes to see herself as the person to changed my world and in a lot of ways she did.
She was the my first longtime love interest.
She is the first i tried doggie with.
She is the only one i've enjoyed anal with.
I had never had a dinner date with a girlfriend before we went out together this year.
She would like to think she was the first person i cheated on my wife with but i know she was one of the first but sadly because of distance she wasn't actually the first or for that matter the last.
She is often the first person i think of in the morning but TM has replaced her as the one that emails me constantly.
She is the first person i shared information with that i was involved with other people.
She is the only person other than my wife that i have woken with the next morning.
She is also the first person i have traveled interstate to see and spend the night with.
Next year i hope she will be part of another first - the 3some.
I just hope it isn't as disappointing as the time i got a head job from a girl without teeth.
Something i had long imagined as being the ultimate sexual experience.
The reality was far from it.
Who knew you needed those choppers to provide a bit of suction?
I am sure there are other firsts but nothing comes to mind.

Feel like sharing yours?

Bored

2011-12-08T12:45:00.001+11:00

I just quit out of a dating site , mainly because i will be away for most of January and really i should be spending the time i have with TM.
Problem is now i'm bored and part of me wants to log back in again.
The sport of connecting and chatting with others is a great temptation.

I plan on sticking to my guns about quitting the site but it is amazing how easy it is to be drawn back in again.

Being more than a little horny isn't helping either.

This weekend, the woman that J works with, who also plagiarized her resume, is taking us out for dinner as a way of saying thanks. It is also a thank you to J for helping her back into teaching after a long absence.
I have promised to be on my best behavior so as not to embarrass her but if her husband is a boring windbag then anything is possible.

I will post next week how it went.

One for the resume

2011-12-05T13:49:00.001+11:00

I was talking down my professional capabilities the other day with TM so she wrote me a brief reference...

To whom it may concern...

I have known Garry intimately for for xx months and I can assure you he is more than capable of performing complex detailed projects to every ones ultimate satisfaction........

Not sure how i can squeeze it into my resume but its nice to hear some positive feedback.

The Virgin Diaries

2011-12-02T08:36:00.001+11:00

Heard on the radio the other day about a reality show from the US called "The Virgin Diaries".

This is the link to the youtube preview.
Watching made me cringe especially the couple at the end of the clip.

It reminded me of the other day when a friend told me how didn't want to catch up with me anymore.
She commented on how she didn't think we were right for each other and how she always felt uncomfortable. Then to top it off she commented i was a crap kisser.
Crap kisser has never been a label that anyone had put on me before but like everything else in life there has to be a first.
I didn't pursue it any further but it has worried me a bit.
What did i do wrong??
Too much tongue? Maybe not enough?
Too touchy feely or maybe not enough. I really don't know and probably never will.
It will have to be chalked up as an experience and one that i can learn from.

Next time i must try a little bit harder.

What i like about The Mermaid

2011-11-29T08:23:00.001+11:00

One thing i have found out about TM in the brief time i have known her is her willingness to get down to business no matter what.
So it was when i stopped by her new house which is currently under construction.
Between the sawdust and exposed walls she was happy to firstly bend down and give me some fine head then she checked my knees could handle the concrete floor before she lowered my trousers completely, hitched up her skirt, removed her underwear and presented a freshly waxed backside.

Outstanding effort and just what i had been waiting for.

Total mind dump

2011-11-25T10:11:00.001+11:00

I've been in a funk over the last few days and i'm going to use this free time i have to unload a bit.

Sort of settling into the new job but the more i do the less i understand.
For the previous 13 years with this company i have been doing work that was initially challenging and then easy.
Taking on this new role i feel every day i'm plunging into the deep end and everyone else stands around watching as i slowly go under.
Even when i bob my head up someone is there to just stand on me and push back a bit.
I knew going in it was going be different but the expectations of the people i'm working for don't match the words initially coming from the account manager.
I'm probably missing half of what i'm told anyway because everyday its either hurry up and finish or there is nothing.

Things at home are also at a heightened level. My son finished school for the year and his idea is to lounge around, eat his way through anything in the refrigerator, freezer or cupboards. Pile his dishes all around the sink and then complain because there's nothing good.
Monday is my RDO and i had planned on spending a quiet day with the wife. Now it will be a day with the wife and son and more than likely my daughter will pull a sickie and she will be there too.
Our holiday is all booked and everything is confirmed. We fly out on the 27th Dec.
When the idea came up of putting a Xmas tree up i thought , What was the point? It will be pulled done on Boxing Day anyway.
Not so, my wife thinks it isn't Xmas with out one so up it will go on 1st Dec.
Yippee

Ruby is starting to get a bit antsy. She is coming down in March for a week before her birthday. Then she will be joined by her husband and daughter for the weekend.
Being that she doesn't like surprises and likes to control everything and put in to place plans miles ahead of when they are needed she is trying to make arrangements for me to have an overnight stay with her. I have no problem with this and will make it a reality as i did a couple of months back. I just wish she would calm down a bit. Whenever we have organised this sort of thing it is often her that pulls out.

Finally there is TM.
I like her a lot. She lives close, is sexy as all get out and likes, no loves sex.
On top of that she knows if she's riding me an orgasm isn't far away.
Apparently up until recently this was like Haley's Comet. Happened all too infrequently.
That's fine with me because if she is enjoying herself then i'm definitely getting off as well.
After one such occasion we were talking and she commented how much she enjoyed my company as well as the side benefits.
You down the track, she went on to say, if we find ourselves without partners then we should get together more regularly out in public rather than on the side.
This takes me completely by surprise as i thought she was happy with her husband.
Turns out he just doesn't flick her switch anymore.
And what does?
Well a tallish man, blond hair, blue/green eyes, slim build and no facial hair.
I smiled, he sounds familiar... made us both laugh.

Must go back to work now before someone else chases me to finish something that i haven't heard about yet.

The countdown has begun.

2011-11-22T07:52:00.001+11:00

It is roughly 37 days til we fly off to Vietnam.
We will be gone for about 4 weeks.

I think that is where my mind is already.

Correct Beer Temperature

2011-11-17T07:56:00.001+11:00

I know most of you guys drink beer, or used to and may offer it to others, so this should be of special interest to you!
How to tell the Correct Temperature of Beer.
For the true and discriminating aficionado, a glass of the finest beer should only be partaken if it is the correct temperature.
The subtle nuance of the melded grains.....
The fragile and fleeting taste of the brewers art.....
Can only be truly appreciated if that golden elixir is properly chilled.
To this end, advanced studies candidates in the Graduate Engineering Department of MIT have developed an easy to use, fully portable Beer Temperature Tester, which very accurately determines whether the beverage is acceptably chilled or not. To test the beer, simply insert the tester into the glasses shown below:

After the tester has been immersed for a period of not less than fifteen seconds, remove probes and observe.

The beer on the left is the correct temperature

Dad

2011-11-14T10:49:00.001+11:00

I posted about Dad and how my daughters friends were so taken by his pictures.
I thought i should post them and you can make up your own mind.

Mentone beach 1952

His 21st Birthday 1955

Just wondered if you were free for a coffee and a fuck?

2011-11-11T15:15:00.001+11:00

That was the message i got from TM on Tuesday afternoon.
Not being used to such a direct approach i was at first a little surprised.
Umm not sure let me get back to you.
As things worked out Wednesday i had a gap in my schedule between where i was and where i needed to be later in the day.
Excellent came her reply, see you soon.
We met at the appointed place and before you could say Hello we were both naked and writhing around, making the most of our time together.
From missionary to her riding me and finishing off with doggie it was as always FANTASTIC.
Never did get around to coffee, oh well maybe next time.

I had made contact again with Dutch and as luck would have it she was free Thursday afternoon before her son came home and i should have been finished my testing handover so it left time to as she put it in her message - meet for a kiss and a cuddle.
An offer to good to knock back. Sadly testing didn't finish early as promised so while having lunch i gave her a call.
Well you could always drop past on your way home after 4:30.
Yes i could do that. I had made plans with the family that i maybe late and this was perfect.
I dropped by as arranged and we sat and recapped, sharing what had happened in the months between our last meeting.
Then we retired to the couch to snuggle.
That lead to the shedding of clothes and some mutual wanking until we both had made a mess.
After a quick shower it was back on with the clothes and a quick drive home.

Plans have been made to meet again on Monday.
She offered to wear some lingerie, knowing it was a favorite of mine and requesting i bring a blindfold along for a bit of fun.

Tell you more later.

Does that make him a GILF?

2011-11-09T13:57:00.001+11:00

My father some time ago decided that not enough of the family knew about his life so he took up the opportunity to write a short autobiography.
He then dutifully presented each of his children, grandchildren, relatives and friends who were mentioned in his book.
I learn t a few things about my father that i didn't previously know but on the whole there weren't too many surprises. He left out details of old loves and past girlfriends, saying only my mother was the "love of his life".

Last week my daughter had a school assignment where she had to write about a family member.
Following on from her fathers footsteps she chose the easiest path and used the book about her grandfather, plagiarizing passages from his writings on his life as a young boy growing up in wartime England.
When her friends spotted it they were interested firstly in how he had come to write it , then flicking through the book they commented that if he was more their own age that they would fancy him.
Not interested in him now as a 77 y/o but the old photos of him as a 17 y/o on the beach got the hearts racing.
This caused some conflicting emotions for my daughter.
Cool that her friends think the book was a bit special but weird that they might fancy him.

I just hope when i am 77 and my grandkids are looking at old photos of me at 17 that they also want to know more.
Highly unlikely as i grew up in the late 70's - early 80's.
A time that fashion forgot.

The only text-speak dictionary you’ll ever need

2011-11-08T18:45:00.001+11:00

Stolen from Hubman's Hangout

AFKM — Away from Keyboard, Masturbating.
BRBM — Be Right Back. Masturbating.
LOLM — Laughing Out Loud, Masturbating.
ROFFM — Rolling On Floor, Furiously Masturbating.
JK/M — Just Kidding/Masturbating.
WTFM — What the Fuck? Masturbate.
MTYL — Masturbate to You Later.
CTC — Can’t Talk. Crying.
IHTWBSAP – I Have Trouble With Basic Spelling and Punctuation
TOMTB – Taking Off My Training Bra
JEOMK – Just Ejaculated On My Keyboard
CILYIMBF – Can I Lock You In My Basement Forever?
NIFOC – Nude In Front Of The Computer
And my favorite
FMLTWIA – Fuck Me Like The Whore I Am

Second week

2011-11-04T10:43:00.001+11:00

So my second week in my new role has been very short because of a RDO and then some horse race.
I am kind of settling into my new role but it's really not the sort of thing i enjoy easily.
I have a fair bit of freedom but i still feel rudderless without a direct supervisor.
My days are spent learning the vagaries of different sites and for a change relying on others to either do the work or assist me with the gaps in my own knowledge.
Luckily for me i have been free with assistance to others so the chance to return the favour in most cases is welcome.
Haven't had a chance to catch up with TM this week which is a bit frustrating but i did receive a special delivery from Eden Fantasys which i will be introducing to TM when i get a chance and reporting on the fun we have with it.
The next couple of weeks i have testing to be done on work that i had been previously involved with so that should keep me very busy.
Fingers crossed it all goes well.

Birthdays at a restaurant

2011-10-31T09:19:00.001+11:00

It was my brothers son's birthday on the weekend.
Being a 12 y/o boy my nephew chose an all you can eat smorgasbord as the venue of his choice.
The night's theme was Village Feast and the Village idiots were out in force.
I don't think of myself as a food snob but then my son showed me a documentary talking about Melbourne. The critic on screen mentioned that there are 3 million people living here and 3 million food critics, so maybe i am one.
The food was woeful but as tradition dictates, if it's your birthday then you can pick whatever you want.
The other thing that stuck me on the night was how many chicks are covered in tatts.
It just reinforces my decision not to get any ink , ever.
Some were subtle but girls with a sleeve of tatts is just going too far.
Nothing sexy about that.
All i came away from the night with was a cold.
It is my brothers birthday next month and i think it will be at a much better venue before my son's which is in December and he has plans on something special as well.

Ruby's favorite commercial

2011-10-31T08:18:00.000+11:00

Can't put my finger on why...lol

Another email

2011-10-28T14:56:00.002+11:00

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.
(Hardly seems worth it.)

If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.
(Now that's more like it!)

The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.
(O.M.G.!)

A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes.
(In my next life, I want to be a pig.)

A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death. (Creepy.)
(I'm still not over the pig.)

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories a hour
(Don't try this at home, maybe at work)

The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.
(Honey, I'm home. What the...?!)

The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field.

(30 minutes..lucky pig! Can you imagine?)

The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.
(What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?)

Some lions mate over 50 times a day.
(I still want to be a pig in my next life..quality over quantity)

Butterflies taste with their feet.

(Something I always wanted to know..)

The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue. (Hmmmmmm.....)

Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.
(If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?)

Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump. (Okay, so that would be a good thing)

A cat's urine glows under a black light.

(I wonder who was paid to figure that out?)

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
( I know some people like that.)

Starfish have no brains
(I know some people like that too.)

Polar bears are left-handed.
(If they switch, they'll live a lot longer)

Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.

(What about that pig??)

Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread these crazy facts and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to, maybe even a chuckle.

In other words, send it to everyone !
(and God love that pig!)

Day 4 of being the boss

2011-10-27T14:20:00.001+11:00

Today is day 4 and it doesn't get any easier.
I feel a bit disconnected from my former life and i find the whole experience strange to say the least.
Up until the week before i always had a place to go. Now i seem to be office based.
I should be reveling in the fact i can come and go but the amount of shit being shoveled my way is a little over whelming.
On top of that i have had to relinquish my old sites and assist the new guys taking over and meeting the clients.

On the positive side between appointments yesterday i got some quality time with TM.
As always she was soaking wet and eager to get naked.
The best way to spend a Wednesday.

I don't get it

2011-10-24T16:00:00.003+11:00

Why would a picture of a cock get so much attention?
It's not even that clear or impressive looking.
Just makes me wonder and then so few comment anyway.

Finally...

2011-10-24T15:12:00.000+11:00

It's happened.
The payrise that i so desired has finally been granted.
Of course like everything work related there are elements that make you feel shit.
So last Monday i rang Jimmy wondering wtf was happening with the payrise post Pitbull?
HeeHee Hee as Jimmy always starts a sentence when he has been caught unprepared.
I will get your interim manager (who i haven't thought up a funny name for) to send a meeting request and we can sit down and work it out.
So i get the request through the week and it's 3:30 Friday afternoon, followed quickly by another changing it to 4 pm.
This sucks because 4 is when i usually finish work for the day and its fricking Friday afternoon but as i have done through out this whole process i smiled and accepted.
I had been talking with TM and our schedules allowed for a brief meet somewhere between where i was working and where she was and still allowing me time to make it back to the office for my 4 o'clock meeting.
As i am driving just after lunch the interim calls and moves my time forward to 2:30 pm.
Sure i can make that and i quickly had to put TM on hold.
I really don't like disappointing her because even 10 minutes together would have taken off the edge.
So i head into the office and interim and i head into Jimmy's office.
Ha ha Gaz this has been a long time in the coming but what do you think of this?
Jimmy hands over a piece of paper with way too many paragraphs on it but in short it advises payroll of my change.
The galling bit about it is the date on the top of the page 1st July 2011

So today was my first day in this new role and quite frankly i hate it.
I have spent the whole day on the phone lining up sub contractors, talking with builders and updating my laptop with the latest and greatest.
Tomorrow i have appointments on site and subbies to meet.
Only that the office is open plan i would have spent the day surfing the net and updating my blog.
(Like i just did in a meeting room downstairs)

Cleaning HNT

2011-10-20T10:00:00.000+11:00

This is how i spent Monday.

Further proof i'm heading to hell

2011-10-17T14:40:00.001+11:00

Had an unusual experience on the weekend when i attended J's niece's, daughters first communion.
Quite a mouthful i realise but this was the first time J's family all got together with her ex husbands family.
To add to the mix each were escorted by their respective "new" partners.
Her niece was talking with her new boyfriend explaining who i was.
And she said, He's my son's godfather.
How could he be the godfather?
Look at him he's standing there with a beer, he was slagging off the priest in the church and he didn't do any of the stuff the Catholics do during mass?
Yes said her niece smiling, fantastic isn't it!
I then leaned across and explained his aunt can cover all the spiritual stuff and i will teach him what the real world is about. The good and the bad.
I did feel sorry for his new girlfriend because other than his ex and a mate of his that she had met the day before she knew nobody.
As i was told to be on my best behavior i just went to work on emptying the fridge and staying right out of the way.
So a shitty way to spend a Saturday night (it started at 6:00pm) and then when we got home the neighbors were having a combined 30th/Engagement party that finished about 3 am.
Blah...

Sunny

2011-10-11T14:04:00.001+11:00

I was going to post script my earlier post but Sunny needs a whole post to herself.
I picked one of the chain coffee shops in a large city department store. It's the one with a train station underneath it so she didn't have to leave the building and potentially get wet.
When i googled it i found there are actually 2 of this chain there so i sent her a text saying i would meet her on Level 2.
She sent a text back saying she was there already and waiting at the chain coffee shop but it was very crowded.
I went to the coffee shop on L2 but the only other person there didn't look like the description she had sent earlier so i rang.
Finally i figured out she was at the basement level just near where her train arrived.
We decided heading upstairs would be quieter so she followed me.
I ordered two coffees while she found somewhere quiet to sit.
I wouldn't say conversation flowed but we conversed about life and gardening(?)
She double checked where i lived but seemed disappointed.
I inquired and she then confessed she had moved since creating her profile and actually lived another 20 kms further away.
As time slipped away i made my excuses to leave but escorted her back to the train entrance that i had met her at.
As i hadn't even shook her hand at the beginning i thought maybe she would accept a small parting kiss.
As i leaned in she grabbed my head and practically shoved her tongue down my throat.
I real typical parting gesture if you had known each other for years but not what i was expecting at that moment.
Yum she announced with a twinkle in her eye.
I haven't had one of them in a long time.
Happy to be able to help you out there Sunny.
She handed me a tissue to wipe away her lipstick and then went back for more.
and more.
I slowly extracted my self from her grip not really sure what had just hit me but it wasn't all bad.
I should find myself in the city more often, she said.
Well actually i'm in a bit of a transition at the moment so i will be on the move more.
Maybe even out my way then?
Yes , quite possibly and with that she gave me one last go, slapped me on the arse and wished me farewell.
Like i said not what i was expecting but nice all the same.

'Theoretically' and 'Realistically'

2011-10-11T11:58:00.003+11:00

A small boy has a school home work question to answer, so he asks his father "Dad, what's the difference between 'theoretically' and 'realistically'?"

His dad thinks and then says "Right-ho son, go and ask your mother if she'd sleep with David Beckham for a million quid."
The boy toddles off and comes back saying "Dad, dad, she said she would! She would sleep with David Beckham for a million pounds."
"OK son," says his dad. "Now go and ask your sister the same question."
The boy toddles off, and comes back saying "Dad, dad, she said she would too!"

So then his dad says "Right, son, now go and ask your brother if he'd sleep with David Beckham for a million pounds."
The son comes back excitedly saying "Dad! Dad! He said he would too!"

"Well there you have it, son," said his dad. Theoretically we could be sitting on three million quid. Realistically we're living with two tarts and a poof."

Dating websites - My addiction

2011-10-11T11:16:00.001+11:00

I think my addiction to these websites is getting out of hand.
Admittedly i have met a few people from there but if you looked purely at numbers my success rate is dismal.
Regardless of that i still go back.
The one i am a most active member of has a chatroom. Well more a chat window that if someone accepts your request you can then communicate with them either leaving an off line message or as sometimes happens you can talk live with them.
There are no webcams so it is purely words and some dinky emoticons.
From this i have a coffee date finally with a woman i will call Sunshine or more rather Sunny because she will only venture out to meet me in the city on a Sunny day.
Today isn't exactly sunny or warm for that matter but finally she has agreed to meet with me.
This proposed meeting was first suggested before i met with TM and after Dutch had decided she and i could be no more.
I know your thinking what about TM but as this meeting has been on hold for so long i am intrigued and want to finally meet her.
She lives miles away from me and haven't seen a picture so unless she is really special i reckon this might be our one and only meeting.
Of course if she is really special then i will have to make her aware that TM comes first.
I will post script this when i return if there is much to report.

Toy Review - Bull nose nipple clamps

2011-10-05T10:31:00.000+11:00

The long awaited toy review is finally here.

Things have been a bit all over the place for me of late but i finally found some quiet time with TM to give the latest sex toy from Eden Fantasys a good test run.
We met at her place early one morning and once she was naked i pulled the out the clamps.
Ooohhh was her first words.
Wow they look so fierce.
You trust me don't you? i asked.
Of course she said with some trepidation.
So i adjusted the size of the clamp and placed the first one on her slightly erect nipple.
Ouch, might have to adjust that a bit more.
I adjusted it again and stood back to admire my handy work.
Then i placed the other on and really enjoyed what i saw.
TM was hesitant at first but seemed to really enjoy the tugging sensation as i worked her from behind and the connecting chain dragged along the floor.
I flipped her over again and removed the clamps which had left a slight mark on one of her nipples.
Just perfect for me to kiss better.
The nipple clamps seem to have heightened her sensitivity because she was came quite quickly after i started sucking on them.
Overall i would say they were a fantastic product and one that will get plenty of use in the future.
Thanks again to Kayla and the staff at Eden Fantasys

He's no more

2011-10-04T09:21:00.001+11:00

While i was writing the last post i got a call from Jimmy.
He was ringing to say the "Pitbull is no more"
Yes that's right Pitbull finally pulled the pin and we are again managerless.
Pommy Dave has already been in my ear wanting me to take over but it's never going to happen.
Funny thing is i had rang the female Ops manager last week to see if she would support me in a team change or staff swap. Hadn't sort out the finer points yet.
Now i start again, i just hope we don't get another dickhead in charge.

I'm back

2011-10-04T08:49:00.001+11:00

Firstly i should explain i have been a bit busy of late.
Where i was working they upgraded the ADSL connection and then nothing worked.
Got people in to sort it out but never had a moment to myself to blog.
Have caught up with TM and had the best start to a day in a long time.
Also got to play with the sex toy i was sent to review but haven't yet.
In amongst this madness Pitbull called me up.
He had received a call from HR wondering why i had a request in the system for a grade increase but nothing had been done about it?
He then went on to bullshit that it was an embarrassment to him that the whole increase had dragged on for so long and how he was finally coming to realise why i had been so pissed off of late.
He fired off a string of emails about how i had to make arrangements for my replacement and make sure that the customers were aware of the changes. This he said was mandatory and would start at the beginning of October.
I followed his instructions to the letter and duly informed the facility manager of the change.
Why? are you telling me about this? This should come from Pitbull ... shouldn't it?
I agreed with her and showed her the email from him telling me what needed to be done.
Right she said and rang him, Pommy Dave and i sat quietly in the background as she tore strips off him over his non professionalism and how such news shouldn't be relayed by a tech.
Pitbull later called and requested i keep them in the dark about my changes and the transition of the new guy.
I protested that this wasn't what he had said in the email but he brushed that off.
Anyway things are finally moving and i feel like it's headed the right way.

More about Ruby's birthday

2011-09-26T15:33:00.000+10:00

I mentioned awhile back plans for Ruby's birthday party (here if your wondering) and things are progressing nicely thank you very much.
While we were talking as we tend to do most days Ruby told me of a dream she had and when she woke up finished herself off with a the toy i had given her.
Her dream was that she had her head between Dutch's legs and i was working her from behind.
All this took place in my spa in the backyard.
She then asked me whether this could become a reality?
Remembering Ruby and Dutch have never met i thought this was an odd request.
Haven't you dreamed of the two of us together?
Sure i have but i don't know how Dutch feels about this?
Well today i found out.
Dutch it seems is all for it. Although she expressed some disappointment it wasn't 2 guys instead.
I just laughed and said"If its two guys you want i can organise that i'm sure"
That girl just continues to surprise me.

A funny conversation

2011-09-21T12:24:00.001+10:00

I was talking with TM the other day and the subject slipped into sex as it often does.
She confessed that with me she feels much more liberated than with her husband that she has spent the past 35 yrs with.
This revelation stunned me as i treat her the same way i do my own wife.
Give or take a bit of detail each knows as much as the other and i don't have any special party tricks that i save specifically for the ladies i see casually.
Maybe i give too much of myself but i couldn't function on any other level especially when i am intimate with them.
Sort of feels dirty in an odd way.
Do other people find that they wear a mask when with a lover as opposed to when they are with their spouse?

A wife's confession

2011-09-19T09:12:00.002+10:00

An elderly couple were having dinner one evening when the husband reached across the table, took his wife's hand in his and said, "Martha, soon we will be married 50 years, and there's something I have to know. In all of these 50 years, have you ever been unfaithful to me?" Martha replied "Well Henry, I have to be honest with you. Yes, I've been unfaithful to you three times during these 50 years, but always for a good reason.

Henry was obviously hurt by his wife's confession but said "I never suspected. Can you tell me what you mean by 'good reasons'?''

Martha said "The first time was shortly after we were married, and we were about to lose our little house because we couldn't pay the mortgage. Do you remember that one evening I went to see the banker and the next day he notified you that the loan would be extended?" Henry recalled the visit to the banker and said "I can forgive you for that. You saved our home, but what about the second time?"

Martha said "Do you remember when you were so sick, but we didn't have the money to pay for the heart surgery you needed? Well, I went to see your doctor one night and, if you recall, he did the surgery at no charge". "I recall that" said Henry. "And you did it to save my life, so of course I can forgive you for that. Now tell me about the third time."

"Alright" Martha said. "So do you remember when you ran for president of your golf club, and you needed 73 more votes..."

Aussie coffee to London

2011-09-15T10:56:00.001+10:00

I read this article with much interest http://www.theage.com.au/entertainment/restaurants-and-bars/espressos-to-england-20110910-1k2m0.html.
Sadly they came a bit late and when i was traveling with the family being the only one drinking coffee it was never high on the list of things to do and see while we were there.
So i hope you folk in the UK get out to the aussie cafe's and experience a bit of our culture. It is way different to Starbaucks or any of the chain coffee houses and if that works for you then you have an excuse to slip down and experience it first hand.

TMI Tuesday

2011-09-13T15:40:00.001+10:00

Don't usually think i could offer anything new to TMI since i usually post to much but this one appealed

Welcome to another TMI Tuesday. This week’s topic is dating. Even if you are not single or dating you can easily answer the questions as if you are single and dating. It’s fun, enjoy!
DATING
1. You’re on a speed date. You’ve got 7 minutes with the potential partner. You already know the person’s name. What are the first three questions you would ask?
I would want to know where they lived?What they expected?Are they alone?
2. Have you ever participated in speed dating? Did you get a regular date/second date out of it?
Never speed dated but wondered how i would go.
3. Do you participate in online dating? How many dates have you had as a result of online dating sites/matches?
Yes , had a few and am currently seeing 2 of them and in contact with a couple of others.
4. You are attracted to:a. Who people are?b. What people have?c. What they can do?
I tend towards people who are also attached but if the profile appeals then i will try and connect.
5. What “little red flag” will cause you to end a date or immediately decide this person isn’t for you?
When they start asking for money.
6. What do you feel you need to sacrifice or have sacrificed to be a part of a relationship?
Personal space
7. If you cooked for your date, what would you cook?Tend to do most of the cooking at home so whatever they fancied. Don't have a specialty as such.
8. At the end of a first date, how would you kiss your date?a. Press your lips against theirsb. Gentle kiss on the cheekc. Lots o’ tongue, like you’re on a tonsil explorationd. I don’t kiss on the first date
Most first dates end with a kiss but it is usually fairly chaste. Some i would like to end with a tongue but as most are in public places it doesn't seem appropriate.
Bonus: You just put up a profile on a dating site. You must describe yourself in 10 words or less. What are your 10 words?
Married but interested in an ongoing casual connection.

How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!Happy TMI Tuesday!

What a difference an orgasm makes

2011-09-13T11:04:00.001+10:00

The other day I was talking with TM and she was telling me what a fantastic lover I was.Never mind hearing stories like that and it sure boosts your ego.She went on to say how in the few months we have been seeing each other how she has had orgasms than she had with her previous fling over a 2 year period.It is pleasing to hear that sort of report and then a little weird that she thought to count them.If i hadn't written it down i wouldn't have even known how long i had been seeing her. Even then it's not a truly reliable memoir as not everything is written down.Interesting and worthwhile noting, maybe just for my own ego.

It's finals time again

2011-09-09T11:47:00.000+10:00

This weekend we (the family and i) are heading to the Dome to watch J's team play in an Elimination final on Saturday night.My team play earlier in the day in a Qualifying final.Depending on how our respective team play this weekend and next our teams will play each other in the Preliminary Finals in the 3rd week.Got my fingers crossed for both as i have seen her team more than my own this year it will be difficult watching if both make it that far.All i can say is Go Pies !!!

Happy hump day

2011-09-08T15:51:00.002+10:00

Got a message from TM in the morning saying she had a bit going on but hoped our schedules coincided.As it turned out i wasn't far from where she was.I sent a message saying i was available and wondered where she might have been.Her reply was quick.Meet me at so and so in 20 minutes and park in the street.I arrived some 25 minutes later and made my way down to the appointed meeting place.Turned out to be a rental property that she owned that was between tenants.Her task was to check it over and report back to the agent that there was no damage and the bond could be returned.I knocked and was ushered in.Obviously there were people there previously but now it was clean and empty of all furniture.In no time at all she maneuvered our bodies into a vacant bedroom and like magic we were both naked.Her dripping and me rock hard.We quickly went back to shagging against the wall until she asked me to lay back so she could ride me. This is possibly my all time fav position.When she leaned forward i took the opportunity to latch onto her nipples sucking for all I'm worth.Not long after she was shaking as her orgasm started taking her over.Then we changed positions with her on her knees happily allowing me to slam away.Soon it was my turn to start shaking as my climax waved through.We then just laid together while we caught our breath.Happy Hump day to me

Husband sued by wife for lack of sex

2011-09-06T10:58:00.003+10:00

Voulez vous coucher avec moi ce soir? The wrong answer to that question has cost one Frenchman more than $13,000.The 51-year-old man has been successfully sued by his ex-wife, who claimed he did not have sex with her enough during 21 years of marriage.The couple, who raised two children in the French Riviera, were granted divorce in Nice, southern France, two years ago, with the wife blaming her husband's low libido for the split.Advertisement: Story continues belowThe divorce court ruled the husband, known only as Jean-Louis B, was "solely responsible" for the break up.London's Telegraph reported the 47-year-old woman recently took the matter back to court to seek 10,000 euros in damages for the inactive sex life.The woman was successful under France's civil code, which states that a married couple must share a communal life.In a rare legal decision, the judge in the south of France's highest court in Aix-en-Provence said it meant that “sexual relations must form part of a marriage”.The man had tried to claim health problems, tiredness and the stress of his work had stopped him from wanting to have sex during the marriage, The Daily Mail reported.But the judge said: “A sexual relationship between husband and wife is the expression of affection they have for each other, and in this case it was absent."By getting married, couples agree to sharing their life and this clearly implies they will have sex with each other."smh.com.auRead more: http://www.theage.com.au/lifestyle/life/husband-sued-by-wife-for-lack-of-sex-20110906-1juqw.html#ixzz1X854ZN80

TBD and HR

2011-09-05T14:13:00.000+10:00

TBD rang and told me HR had finally caught up with him. Some 2 months from their first meeting.We sat in one of the small boardrooms.TBD and i on one side with one of the HR chicks and pitbull opposite.TBD had told me before it started if he wasn't happy with the way things were going he planned on pulling the pin on the meeting and requesting a new meeting at a later date with union representation.He raised his issues with HR and completely without passion she just stared him down.I thought TBD went to far when at one point he looked her in the eye and stated "I've been at this company 35 bloody years, probably longer than you have been on this earth"He glanced at me and i just winced.To HR's credit she took what he said and explained again it wasn't personal. Just business and it made no difference whether he had been with the company 35 years or 3 years he had to change or be changed.The alternative was he could leave the company.Great he said , just give me 4 weeks for every year and i will leave.This finally got a smile as she explained that was never going to happen.While they were bantering i sneaked a glance at what was expected of TDB to achieve the outcome they felt was satisfactory.To be honest if that was all it was about then my first thought that they are cracking a walnut with a sledgehammer seemed an appropriate analogy.Being as TBD is an old cantankerous bastard at times he was hell bent on documenting that he didn't agree with the opening statements in the document.Why not, i suggested, you just make a note on the last page there that says "comments" then everyone can sign it and it will be filed away.If it ever comes up again your opinions are then noted in perpetuity. TBD - Can I do that?HR - Sure write whatever you like and it then is keep on your your permanent record.TBD - GoodyAnd he went to work with relish writing what he thought of the whole process.After 1/2 hour it was all over and we had a bit of a chat in the carpark before jumping in our cars and heading home.After the first meeting pitbull sought my opinion on how it went.He obviously didn't like my thoughts because he hasn't chased me down to see what i thought of this one.TBD has a month to change their perception of his work or more rather pitbull's opinion and then if he gets 2 months in a row without incident the whole matter is swept away.Not sure if TBD will be around that long but for now i am glad he is.

Hump day

2011-08-31T14:44:00.001+10:00

Here's a hump day video i found

Check out those earrings.

Small world

2011-08-30T13:58:00.002+10:00

I have spoken previously about how the IT girl i met through a dating site but never hooked up with also knows someone i work with.
I was always cool with the idea because she had promised it would stay between us.
Occasionally IT girl would torment me and suggest that she would tell the female Manager concerned but i never really took it seriously. Well initially i was scared shitless but as time went on i relaxed a bit.
Until this week.
I woke up Sunday morning to find a text on my phone from the IT girl.
I deleted it of course but from what i remember it said.
"Was out having drinks last night with (insert name here)and i told her i knew someone she worked with' I told her it was you.
FUCK was my first thought.
So on Monday i sent a reply to IT girl saying something about my thought process.
It went holy shit and then i thought maybe she was just winding me up again so i added i thought she might be full of shit.
Thankfully she took my reply in good humour and went on to explain how they were talking over many drinks on Saturday night and how she had met me somewhere online.
The manager said some nice stuff about me and we left it like that.
The next day i was talking with that manager about other things and she asked me about a comment i made in an email to a third person.
I explained it was my brother i was talking about as the other guy knew him.
Oh, said the manager, then an uneasy laugh.
She finished with "Small world isn't it"
Makes me wonder if she did tell her what online forum we had met on.
Nothing i can do about it now so i will just try and bluff my way forward until it's forgotten about i guess

Growing up to be like her Dad

2011-08-30T12:45:00.003+10:00

My daughter has a problem and i'm not sure how to solve it.
She has decided the best course of action to any problem is lie.
Lie and deny until the house of cards she has built around her starts to crumble and then she will confess to as much as you are already aware of and admit to nothing else.
Sadly for my wife this is exactly the same path that i take when confronted.
I do mix it up a little and pepper my stories with enough truth that whatever i said comes out as plausible in her eyes.
It does seem like a genetic disposition that she luckily(?) has inherited and not the direction my son tends to take.
His tactic is to admit to all wrong doings and explain it away with charm.
Something my daughter and i obviously are incapable of doing , hence the web of lies.
My dilemma is that i have to explain to consequences of her actions and try and help her come up with a solution that will make her mother happy.
Maybe i can come up with a better lie than her and convince her to change her ways.

This is what i got in my inbox Saturday morning

2011-08-29T14:31:00.002+10:00

This is what i awoke to Saturday morning in my Inbox

Good thing i don't share it with anyone else.

Work stuff

2011-08-25T13:00:00.009+10:00

I haven't spoken much about work lately so i thought i should put something down so i don't forget.
Pitbull and Jimmy are playing me off each other , telling me one thing and then scurrying around and saying the opposite.
Then to make it worse they blame each other for their shit decisions.
I fronted Pitbull demanding to know what's going on?
He just shrugged his shoulders and gave me the sad doggy eyes and mumbled something about the decision wasn't his.
Then in the next breath he craps on how he is a good people manager.
At this point i excused myself and left the room.
Not a good sign to burst out laughing in your bosses face is it?
Anyway i have been given a bit more freedom and because of that i have made the most of it.
With a bit of work in Dutch's neighborhood i plan on getting reacquainted with her and then try my hardest to keep TM happy too.
Ruby is still around and just to be safe she has wiped the tape we made.
Now the only copies are on my hard drive and a DVD i made for her while we were away.
Not like it was an award winning performance but a nice memento.
She wants to do it all again only this time with out our voices included.

What a week

2011-08-23T13:40:00.003+10:00

I had last week.
I will tell you about my daughters latest episode first then talk about what I've been up to.
My dear sweet daughters Year 8 coordinator rang me the other morning quite distressed.
It seems she was busted mucking around in the corridors of her school during lunch.
Doing god knows what but she was somewhere she shouldn't have been.
When the teacher asked for her name so she could be written up for a code( which is like a strike, 3 and you've got a detention)my quick thinking daughter gave someone else s name. That was fine except when the coordinator went to speak to the person it all went pear shaped for my daughter.
Even when confronted about it she denied any wrong doing, even suggested the other girl might be the one telling lies.
Eventually she crumbled and trotted out the old line about not wanting to get into any trouble without realising how much more trouble she was now in.
Her punishment is an afterschool detention. All of a hour.
Really wasn't worth bull shitting about.

So on to me
Had to work through the night Wednesday and into Thursday so i had the day off on recovery.
What better way to recover than call up TM.
She was shopping just around the corner so made it to my place in no time at all.
She came in, i showed her around and then removed her clothes.
It had been awhile for both of us so the orgasms came fairly quickly and easily.
While we were recovering my phone rang.
It was a call i was expecting so i sat on the couch and took the call.
TM slid over and started sucking my cock and taking my balls into her mouth while i tried to remain composed.
The next day i was working near Dutch and had arranged to meet her for coffee at the shopping centre near her.
We sat and chatted for ages and she enquired if i had met anyone new?
I said i had but it was still early days.
We talked and when her hand accidentally brushed my crotch.
In fairness to myself she had just told me how she had brought some CFM heels and how she had the best lingerie to go with them.
When she had realised it wasn't my phone that she had bumped in my pocket a big smile crossed her face.
So... maybe you do miss me?
She went on to tell me how if i was working late Thursdays or early Fridays i was always welcome and she wouldn't judge.
More questions were asked but i had work to do so it ended there but with a promise of more to come.

Somebody that i used to know

2011-08-23T10:19:00.001+10:00

I am sorry to say i had missed this coming out but when J told me about it it was perfect.

I think it is a fantastic song and everyone should check it out.

Planning ahead

2011-08-15T11:45:00.002+10:00

Next year it's Ruby's 50th birthday so i offered to plan a special day for her.
Of course that would require her to take a trip down South but i have promised to make it a memorable one for her.http://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gif
So far my thoughts are:
Cooking her a whole Barramundi on the BBQ.
I also thought about organising that 3some we have long spoken of.
If it were for me i would request another lady to join us but as it's all about Ruby then it will be a guy.
I don't know whether to organise it with a guy that i know well or just a random.
Randoms have their pro's and con's.
Pro would be we wouldn't have to see him again but against that neither of us know where he has been before.
I will wrestle with this for a bit longer and then figure out which way to go.
Any suggestions from the followers are always welcome.

A preview of our first feature

2011-08-11T11:11:00.002+10:00

3 days and 2 nights extended

2011-08-11T08:34:00.004+10:00

So i hit the road around lunchtime with the family believing i was heading to the airport to catch a flight interstate.
Instead i sped past the airport headed North up the Hume.
While i was driving Ruby was headed West with a colleague who she was dropping off on the way.
When she had time she would call to check with my progress. Of course i was making good time as the roads were clear and i was keen to get there.
I arrived just over the border about 1/2 hour before her so i waited in the carpark next door.
She called after checking in and i helped her carry her bags up to our room.
Once the lift doors closed our lips locked for the first time in ages.
Wow i said , your looking fantastic. How much weight have you lost now?
Total of 45 kgs, she assured me, and there is more to come off yet.
We got in the room and dropped everything on the floor.
As we had both been driving for the past few hours a shower was the first priority.
I jumped in and out as quick as possible so as not to waste a minute. She soon followed and then it was on to the bed for the first of many.
The best bit about Ruby is she doesn't care how fast or slow it takes. She just wants me and will do anything to get what she likes.
We made our obligatory calls home and tormented each other masturbating while the other was talking to their family.
We went out to dinner and back to the room for some extended loving.
She brought the lovely toy from EdenFantasys for extra pleasure and playtime.
The next morning she headed off to work and i filled in my day wandering around getting to know the town we were in.
Late afternoon she came back to find i had worked out a way to download our movie from the analogue tape onto a DVD.

While all this was happening I was receiving i got the occasional text or picture like the one on the left from TM.
Tuesday night we headed out and ate dinner in the Motels restaurant because walking the streets seemed to cold and wet.
After dinner it was back at the room for more of the same.
We mastered a new angle of having sex, a sort of sideways version that we had seen in a Karma Sutra book.
She had commented that the morning before she wanted to grab my cock and get it going but thought i needed to sleep.
On the last morning she did infact wake me at 5:30 and then again at 7:30.
I as i promised gave her the orgasms she was seeking and sent her to work in the morning with me running out all day.
We had lunch together then it was back on the road , home for me and a lonely night alone for Ruby.
We never got around to organising that 3some but there is always next time.

3 days and 2 nights

2011-08-10T11:50:00.001+10:00

With thanks to Dick Smith i now have a digital copy of Ruby and my time together.
Thanks Dick ! is the title of our little movie and it means the tape can safely be erased and no one will be hurt from its contents.
I will post more tomorrow on our couple of days together.
Thanks Ruby xxx

Loving every minute with Ruby

2011-08-08T20:14:00.001+10:00

I am happily spending the next two nights in a Motel room with Ruby and loving every minute of it.
As i type this she is lying on the bed using the toy from Eden Fantasys.

Toy review - Jelly Crystal anal starter

2011-08-08T10:13:00.003+10:00

So here is my latest toy review and remember for all your sex toy needs contact Eden Fantasys.
http://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gif
So on to the review.
The package arrived as usual in a discrete brown box with "Electronics" as the description of the contents.
Not sure why it is but whenever i get something delivered it causes much interest around the office.
Any way i took it home and then did a little research on the product.
One comment that stuck out was the anal starter had a decidedly plasticy smell which after holding the product for a while it did.
First impressions were it was quite thin and very pliable.
I also found out that it wasn't machine washable which was a downside as it couldn't be shared easily.
It has a suction cup base but i doubt that would be very useful. Well it wasn't for me anyway.
Design wise it is very detailed and relatively lifelike in its appearance.
It would be if your cock was a clear plastic any way.
As it wasn't machine washable i placed a condom over it and then smeared it with lube.
Anally i am a virgin so i wondered how this might feel?
Initially my aim wasn't the best and it just resisted insertion and bent away from the entry.http://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gif
Finally with a bit of coaxing it made its way in but again as this was all new to me not what i would call the most pleasurable experience.
It does make me wonder what people get out of it.
I know Ruby is a big anal fan but comparing my cock to the anal starter its like a child next to a man.
Overall the experience wasn't one i would repeat but if you ever thought about trying anal but thought your partner was going to be too big this would be ideal !.
Thanks again to Kayla and the guys at Eden Fantasys. The best place for all your sex toy needs.

Next week with Ruby

2011-08-04T10:11:00.003+10:00

Yes that's right Ruby and I are catching up again next week for 3 days of debauchery.
Actually it will be 2 whole nights and i will be around during the day while she is working.
Cheeky thing has even penciled in appointment times with me so she gets a break from what she has to do.
I told her that if she has gone to that much trouble that we should make it special.
Not sure what she has planned but as we both will be together anything is possible.
This will be the second time that we get to spend an extended time together and as it we will be staying in a place where no one knows us there won't be issues with going out and being seen together.
She has hinted that she wanted to try MFM and has placed ads on some swinger sites but i don't know how successful she has been.
Could be fun.
I will post when i can and tell you all about it.

Cinders and a rant

2011-07-29T11:48:00.002+10:00

I forgot to say when i was sitting with Cinders her phone rang. Nothing special about that except her ringtone was
Again nothing special only that Ruby thinks of me when she hears it.
Have a listen and you might understand why.

So on Friday i had my mid year review with Pitbull. As we had spent a bit of time together of late this was a just a formality.
Yes Gaz I can say your grade increase has been approved, oh except for one little thing.
Oh...what's that?
Jimy is holding it back until your replacement has taken over your role in the building your looking after.
WTF???
Yes it's out of my hands, said Pitbull.
Every fibre in my body was screaming , Tell him he can shove his grade increase.
Instead i smiled, cocked my head and said , That's fucking typical.
I wouldn't as a rule swear like that to my boss but under the circumstances he accepted it and took it.
In reality it should be the managers job to ensure this guy takes up the challenge and follows up that he is doing his job.
The other guy hasn't said anything to my face but has told others there is no way he is going to be working on this site.
I left the review and drafted an email to the incumbent stating i will be there on Tuesday morning, all he has to do is meet me , complete the inductions and get introduced to the Managers on site.
When he doesn't front i have to be a prick and dob him into my manager stating how he didn't turn up and made no effort to contact me.
Then again he cpiuld always surprise me and be there on Tuesday.
Somehow i doubt it.

Lunch with Cinders

2011-07-28T14:44:00.002+10:00

Haven't had much time to update it but i got to catch up with Cinders yesterday.
Cinders you may remember had moved to a town on the border some 200 kms away.
As luck would have it i was working in the same town but because it was all a bit last minute didn't get a chance to fore warn her.
On the way i stopped and sent her a text asking if she was still living in the same country town?
She replied instantly that yes she was and why?
I replied i was some 50 k's from her and wondered what she was up to.
Cool , let me know when your finished and we can get together.
I sent her another message and as it was lunchtime offered to meet any place she fancied for a bite to eat.
I have been accused of being a cheapskate before but this was her pick.
Seeing as we are both consenting adults she could have picked a hotel, a cafe bistro even a coffee shop or the wonderful bakery overlooking the river.
She choose ... McDonalds.
I ordered her a large chicken burger meal and something for myself and waited.
After 5 minutes she appeared looking radiant as ever.
We talked and ate and caught up on the world.
She was happy i had found someone and explained she was still in the process of looking but getting very disheartened in the what was available.
After we finished we wandered down and watched the paddle steamers going down the river.
Even though the sun was out , it was quite cold in the shade and we stood cuddling enjoying the views.
I thought the way she was holding on that i wasn't getting away anytime soon.
A few kisses and more talking , it was time for me to head off.
She walked me back to my car and i drove off into the sunset.
It is always nice to catch up with friends and i promised if an overnighter ever became available she was more than welcome to keep me company.

The Splendiferous Barfing Cup

2011-07-26T11:52:00.002+10:00

A result of too much spare time